The Truth Will set you free~Day 4
Today we move on to taking an inventory of the pain in our adult life.
The point of all this is effort is that we want freedom from the pain of the past. We know that it is the truth that sets us free. So we are pressing into the truth.
To encourage you as a coach might encourage an athlete before a tough match, I want to give you an example of what it can look like from my own life.
A few months ago I took this course myself, as I came to this day, I knew God was prompting me to let a truth set me free.
I shared about a painful season in my family. Some of you already know. A couple of years ago my youngest daughter came to us saying she was questioning her faith and God. That quickly turned into her saying she does not believe at all.
That, in itself was painful for her dad and I. She was a sophomore in college at the time. She attends a very liberal art school, where philosophy is her new favorite class. I jumped into panic mode trying to argue her back. Obviously we all know that does not work! We started praying, reading books, praying some more and really leaning into the Lord.
A little over a year ago she wrote us a letter saying she is gay! I remember opening that letter and reading those words, and it was like a movie where you hear no sound, but can hear the persons heart beat. I sat and just stared at those words for what seemed like hours.
It was like living in a nightmare…I can remember getting on my knees on my kitchen floor, feeling sick to my stomach. Panic taking over my body. I sat there, crying uncontrollably and saying over and over “NO GOD, NO!” Then that turned to WHY WHY WHY.
I went through a period of shame and guilt wondering where we went wrong as parents. I blamed us, I blamed her school, her friends, her environment and anything I could think of.
There was a constant “elephant” in the room, I thought maybe if we never talked about it, it would go away. That hasn’t happened. I think I could write a book on what “not to do when your child tells you they are gay”. I did everything wrong. I said everything wrong, and I pushed the pain and the reality down deep.
When the subject reared its ugly head, I quickly changed it. I talked to very few people about it. I allowed satan to fill my head with lie after lie, we were all angry and confrontational. Bailey trying to push me into an area of conversation that I did NOT want to have.
The more I hid my head in the sand, the more angry and hurt she got. And the more hurt I got. Thank goodness for this course to teach me how to cope, how to face my pain head on and finally be free.
Do I still have pain in my heart? yes. Is it devastating still? No. I have the tools and a new found, deeper relationship with the Lord and He will see me through.
So many people I know have made the decision to hide a shameful secret in their past. I think it’s just part of the human condition. We’re born vulnerable and ignorant and we’re pounded by an enemy who attacks us where we’re weak. But with all that, we’re not the only one that ever betrayed another or suffered abuse. It’s a job hazard we all face.
God made us for freedom. Jesus was a liberator who came to set the captives free. Haven’t you suffered enough? Jesus, the way, the life, and the truth, will set you free if you trust him. It is exhausting to hide. It takes effort to grit your teeth and remain silent.
Over the past week, you have embraced 1 John 1:9 – “If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness.” You have embraced truth and taken back territory from the enemy.
He can’t shame you if you have shined the light on the places he used to hide. Without secrets, his lies have no power.
Application
1. Inventory the pain of your adult years.
2. When you’re done with that, it’s time to take an inventory of the places where you are experiencing freedom. Write them down in a journal.
3. Thank the Lord for the freedom he’s given you. Ask him to show you what difference it will make in your life.
4. Now that you are free, how will you live? How will this impact the pain that you feel?
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